• Format: XBLA (version reviewed), PSN
• Unleashed: Out Now
• Publisher: Konami
• Developer: Backbone Entertainment
• Players: 1-4 (offline), 2-4 (online)
• Site: http://www.konami.com/simpsonsarcade

If you’re cowering in your late twenties to mid thirties and you’ve been gaming since you were a wee lad or lass, you’ll almost certainly have fond memories of The Simpsons Arcade Game. It was arguably the jewel in Konami’s crown at one point, further cementing its position as one of the major players in arcades during the early nineties. Over twenty years later, a perfect home version is finally available; but with the rose tinted specs removed and crushed underfoot, what do we see?

For those that don’t know, this is a scrolling beat ‘em up for up to four people. Players take control of one of the four older Simpsons – Homer (who punches people in the face), Marge (who, being a woman, carries a vacuum cleaner at all times), Lisa (who hits people with her skipping rope), or Bart (who rides and – yes, hits people with – his skateboard) – and fight their way through eight brief stages. Why? Because an entirely out of character Smithers steals a diamond (what?), kidnaps Maggie when she accidentally takes said diamond (whatwhat?) and, when you finally catch up to him, he tries to kill you with explosives (whatwhatwhat??!?).

Whether you go for ‘sharp’ or ‘smooth’, the heavily pixelated graphics are undeniably dated – yet still manage to hold up surprisingly well in 2012. This is thanks to the Groening flavoured graphic design which, in turn, has changed very little in the Simpsons cartoon series over the years. Take note publishers, this is how to get your developers to create graphics that age well. Not lens flare, cleavage and muddy browns – smart and original art direction.

Mr Burns looks on as Marge and Homer... um... er...

The sound hasn’t aged too badly either, though the music and sound effects are supremely forgettable. Unfortunately, the rather more important element of gameplay has suffered the most bumps and crashes on the journey through the decades. You move from left to right beating up everyone and everything that gets in your way till the next stage – and that’s it. There’s the occasional health pickup, and it can be fun taking the opportunity to pick up and throw Snowball II or Santa’s Little Helper at an enemy – but, apart from two super-brief minigames you only play once each, that really is your lot.

Combat, such as it is, is achingly simple. There is a button to attack and a button to jump. Yes, you can jump attack – woohoo! Of slightly more interest are the combination attacks possible when two players team up, but they add little to the experience. You’ll still be doing little more than button-bashing your way through the same handful of enemy designs across eight stages, and it’s even possible (depending on difficulty chosen and number of players present) to finish the whole game in less than half an hour; indeed, there is an achievement/trophy for doing so.

The value of this package, therefore, hinges on replay value. There are no secrets to speak of, and no alternative routes, so the game itself contains very little. The Simpsons license has been squandered quite badly, too. Although the voices of the original actors are present, they only speak the same few words throughout. There is no original, fully-featured script; no easter eggs to hunt down. That said, it can be fun (the first time through, at least) to see how many characters and references you recognise in both the foreground and background – especially as the game was made so early in the cartoon’s life. People old enough to remember the original release will probably wistfully think “mode 7” when they come up against the giant Krusty ball boss…

This vacuum cleaner picks up dust from tiny nooks, cleans carpets, and easily kills human beings!

This release is a little more than a simple ROM dump. Local multiplayer is still present but online multiplayer has been added too, if you don’t have £120 worth of joypads to play with but want to try it as a four player game (which is easier and a little more enjoyable). There are online leaderboards too, with an admirably large selection of filters. Finishing the USA ROM grants access to the Japanese ROM; which is almost entirely the same game, the largest difference being the presence of smartbomb-style pickups now and again. Also, finishing the game as each of the four characters gives access to extras from the main menu – none of which, sadly, are very interesting. A sound test does have a certain retro appeal, though.

Finally, there is the issue of price. PlayStation Plus subscribers get the game for free, and they should rush to download it immediately if they haven’t already. It may crush fond memories of just how good it was, but it’s still far from being a terrible game, and is sprinkled with an important pinch of Simpsons magic. The XBLA release costs 800MP – which, to be frank, is far too much. Almost everybody who grabs this game will have exhausted its supply of fun in less than a week, and it’s easy to imagine many getting all they can out of it in a single day.

So who is this for? If you have young kids yourself who love The Simpsons then they’ll doubtless have a blast with this, though it’s difficult to say for how long. If you’re determined to revisit the game for yourself then go ahead – but don’t say we didn’t warn you. If you never played the game the first time round and find yourself playing this home re-release, well… you may find yourself wondering what all the fuss was about.

Have you tried games streaming service OnLive yet? If not, why not? Head over here to see what our initial impressions were of it at the Eurogamer Expo launch. The app itself is quick and easy to install, and entirely free; and it will work on almost any PC or Mac. Best of all, almost every game in the catalogue has a free half hour trial. Still need a good reason to give it a try? Okay – how about a code for one month’s worth of the PlayPack, which gives you unlimited access to over 140 games?

We have three of these codes to give away, but please note that they are UK only. Just think – for a month you could play games such as the original Deus Ex, Bioshock, Borderlands, Alpha Protocol, and much more to your heart’s content – completely free! So: what do you need to do?

Simply send an e mail to competitions[at]criticalgamer[dot]co[dot]uk with the words ‘Give me a PlayPack code!’ in the subject line, and your name and county (note the lack of ‘r’) in the mail itself. That’s it. Good luck, and be quick – it’s the first three entries not caught in our spam snare that win!

Terms and Conditions

• Entrants must be eighteen (18) years of age or older to enter, due to PEGI ratings attached to some games. By submitting an entry, you are declaring yourself to be no younger than eighteen (18) years of age.
• The prizes on offer are three (3) codes, redeemable online, each for one month’s access to the OnLive ‘PlayPack Bundle’. There shall be three (3) winners.
• An OnLive account is necessary for the prize to be redeemed. Creating an OnLive account is free.
• No alternative prize shall be offered. Prizes, provided by Indigo Pearl for the purposes of this promotion, are non – returnable.
• There is no official closing date. The competition shall end when the final code has been given away, and this post shall be updated to reflect when this happens.
• The winners will be announced on this website.
• One entry per person. Employees of Critical Gamer, Indigo Pearl, OnLive, and their families are not eligible to enter.
• Anybody found to have breached any of these terms and conditions shall have their entry/entries disqualified.
• The decision of the Critical Gamer administration in all matters pertaining to this competition is final.

Shhhh. Be wery quiet. I’m hunting tewwowists.

Bang! Bangbangbangbangbang!

Sshhh. Be wery quiet. I’m hunting tewwowists.

Bangbangbang!

[closed captions for the hard of hearing]

Paul McCartney with Wings (for extra comfort)

Yes, we’re afraid it’s true; Sir Paul “can’t name any album his music appears on released within the last thirty five years” McCartney is writing music for a videogame. What game? We don’t know! Developer? Ditto. Publisher? Your guess is as good as ours (though we’d say EA). So what do we know about the game? Well, er, Sir Paul “can’t name any album his music appears on released within the last thirty five years” McCartney is writing the music…

This…er… brilliant piece of news was first reported over at the Daily Express. As we’re not in the habit of reading right-wing newspapers obsessed with Princess Diana however, this came to our attention via MCV. The ex-Beatle is quoted as saying: “It’s a fascinating market. A new computer game sells so much better than a new CD these days.” Nice to see he’s taking an interest for all the right reasons!

69 year old McCartney, seemingly having forgotten the fact that he helped launch The Beatles: Rock Band a few years ago, went on: “Young people will hear my music for the first time in a game”. Whatever the game turns out to be, it may be worth praying to the deity of your choice that it isn’t a title where sound and music is integral to the experience such as Rez, Everyday Shooter or Child of Eden. If you can’t switch music off in the options, there’s always the trusty Mute button.

• Format: XBLA
  
• Unleashed: Out Now
• Publisher: UTV Ignition
• Developer: Denki
• Players: 1 (offline), 2-4 (online)
• Site: http://www.denki.co.uk/games/quarrel/

This game sees pirates fighting ninjas, and cavemen fighting robots. Oh, still here? Most people rushed off to buy the game before the end of the first sentence. Well for the rest of you, here’s a review of the actual game – a turn-based strategy word ‘em up. Where innocent people are killed.

In effect, it’s an electronic board game for 2-4 players. Each themed ‘board’ is split up into several parts, with each player allocated an equal number of sections at the beginning of the match. Each section houses a number of little people (or robots. Or Scotsmen), and each of these little people represents a space for a letter (up to a maximum of eight). If you ‘quarrel’ with another player whilst using a piece of land containing four little people, you can make a word up to a maximum of four letters. With us so far?

Two players at a time ‘quarrel’, both using the same eight letters. Each set of letters is always an anagram. Each letter carries a number, as in Scrabble; the highest scoring word, which isn’t necessarily the longest, wins. If both players produce a word of equal value, victory is awarded to whoever submitted their word first. The little chaps on the winning team throw letters at the losing team until they burn and die; and the losers have always led pure, innocent, blameless lives. We know this because, without fail, we see their souls ascending to heaven.

Let’s back up a bit. While it’s clear you can still win if you pit three mini murderers against five, facing an opponent with seven when you have just two doesn’t bode well for victory. This is where tic tacs come in. No, sorry, tactics. During your turn, you can select one of your pieces of land to attack an opponent’s section and initiate a quarrel; or you can bolster your defences by transferring little people from one of your adjoining sections to the other. Two pieces of land with four little people may well be a better choice than one with seven and the other with just one.

Scotsmen vs robots vs cavemen! Sadly, you don't get to pick your characters (we'd all go for ninjas, right?).

If you fight an opponent using a larger team than yours and win, you take ‘prisoners’ equal to the number of extra letter spaces your foe had. More generally speaking, lose while attacking and you lose all but one of your current team; lose while defending, you lose everybody on that section and the land itself. ‘Reinforcements’ are scattered for you at the end of your turn (which lasts until you end it or until you’ve done all you can do), and you can call in one extra wordperson at the start of one quarrel if you’ve accrued enough points (though you can hoard them). Finally, bonus points are awarded for taking the same little team through multiple enemy territories (and winning).

Whew. Got all that?

So: it’s a word game that makes you think in more ways than one and, for a little extra pressure, you’re working against the clock while composing a word when playing online. It’s much simpler and easier to learn than we’ve probably made it appear – and it’s also very, very addictive. Offline game modes aren’t huge but, countering that, AI opponents get agonisingly clever very quickly. Even when you’ve finally conquered the smarmy avatars of your computerised nemeses, there’s always the option of a Quick Match to just jump in and play to scratch that violent word game itch.

Of course, the real pleasure to be had in any word game comes from human opponents; and this is where Quarrel features its most baffling, daftest omissions. There is, for example, no offline multiplayer. Go back and read that as many times as you like, we’re afraid the ‘no’ really is supposed to be there. Okay, so splitscreen Quarrel would be open to cheating but come on; not even some kind of mode incorporating taking turns?

There currently aren’t many people playing online, and virtually all those who are only seem to want to play two player matches; neither of which is the game’s fault. However, why oh why is it only unranked matches (which make it easy to find members of a Party) that offer a lobby list? There isn’t even a rematch option for ranked matches (either that, or every opponent we played was so terrified of our brainpower that they quit the second the match ended). Brownie points are won, however, for anticipating the infamous Rage Quit. When this happened to us in a ranked match, we were automatically handed the victory; during an unranked match, an AI opponent jumped in.

The anagram here is clearly, er, foseflus.

As for the words themselves, well… almost anything goes. Swearing is forbidden (one we tried was rejected as “undesirable!”), though plurals and slang (and letters of the Greek alphabet, and even a type of Armenian folk music – yes, really) are acceptable. The slang seems to be American-centric however, with “ho” and “crappers” being two delightful examples we came across. The potato/potato situation is unclear as, though we never saw any British English used, we saw American English wielded successfully a few times. Also Denki, please note; it’s commendable that you don’t allow hyphenated or apostrophised words but bearing that in mind, costar is not a word!!! That cost us a game. Bitter, us?

The 400MP price is surprisingly low, until you discover that the game started out on iTunes last year – where there’s a free version, and even the ‘Deluxe’ release is only £1.99. Nonetheless, this still represents great value for money, as it does have multiplayer options – unlike the iTunes release. If you can encourage a few online friends to buy it, it becomes an essential purchase. Either way, this is a great way to spend those Microsoft Points burning a hole in your avatar’s pocket.

A sequel to the 2005 PS2, Xbox and PC game Sniper Elite (which saw a 2010 release on the Wii with a bonus level), very little was known of Sniper Elite V2. Until now! Today, developer Rebellion held a one hour live Q&A session on Twitter. A few juicy tidbits of information were tossed out for the public, and we of course stuck our oar in with a few questions of our own. This is what questions from others revealed, some of this you may know but most you probably won’t:

• Steam client needed for the PC version.
• Story “touches on real life scenarios. Action takes place within brain race to steal Nazi V2 tech.”
• No HUD, though there will be a threat indicator.
• If you want a challenge, “Sniper Elite difficulty removes all assistance and provides a fully realistic simulation.”
• The game could take anything from 10-30 hours to complete; “most situations offer multiple approaches”
• “Around 12” of the development team worked on the original game; one of the designers on the first is lead designer on the sequel.
• Described as a reboot, it features “same timeline, different story , missions, objectives etc”
• The developers are aiming to please hardcore fans, but also to appeal to a wider audience via the easier difficulties.
• The PC version will be released alongside the console versions (on Steam, at least)
• Enemies can be identified by rank at a distance, and “The higher the rank, the bigger the threat. Identifying the most dangerous targets is integral to strategy”.

When we asked why they chose to stick with the second world war rather than a more modern setting, they replied: “We looked at every conflict known to man – kept coming back to the Battle of Berlin – strong in history & conflict […] We found sniping to be much better in a lower tech setting”. Fair enough, say we. But how is the gameplay balanced between actual sniping and stealth gameplay? 50/50. 60/40 etc? “This depends on how you choose to play it, it could be as much as 80/20 or as little 20/80”. Combine this with the aforementioned buckshot length estimate of 10-30 hours, and it sounds like the player will actually have a decent say in how they play the missions. This is definitely one to watch.

Throughout history, Nintendo has squished the flies of competition in the handheld arena time and time again, seemingly without trying. Game Gear? Nice try! Lynx? Pshaw. PSP? Close, but no cigar. Wonderswan? Never made it outside of Japan! The Neo Geo Pocket, too, didn’t last long; but it seems that SNK Playmore will be bringing the Neo Geo name back to the world of handheld gaming.

Andriasang details what Japanese site Famicom Plaza has to say about the new device. The console above is currently known only as “Neo Geo Portable Device” with no release date, pricing, or manufacturer details. However, it will reportedly ship with twenty built-in games, all North American versions. No word on if more games can be added to the library; but there is apparently 2GB of internal storage, and the device has a slot for an SD card. The built-in games are apparently to be:

• 1.WORLD HEROES
• 2.ULTIMATE 11
• 3.TOP PLAYER’S GOLF
• 4.SENGOKU
• 5.NAM-1975
• 6.MUTATION NATION
• 7.LAST RESORT
• 8.KING OF MONSTERS
• 9.FRENZY
• 10.CYBER LIP
• 11.FATAL FURY SPECIAL
• 12.ART OF FIGHTING
• 13.SUPER SIDEKICKS
• 14.LEAGUE BOWLING
• 15.METAL SLUG
• 16.MAGICAL LORD
• 17.BASEBALL STARS PROFESSIONAL
• 18.SAMURAI SHODOWN
• 19.KING OF FIGHTERS ’94
• 20.FATAL FURY

Pretty exciting line-up there! Er, right?

• Format: 3DS
  
• Unleashed: Out Now
• Publisher: Nintendo
• Developer: Nintendo/Retro Studios
• Players: 1-8 (local & online)
• Site: http://mariokart7.nintendo.com/

Double Dash (which irked some fans) aside, the Mario Kart games haven’t changed an awful lot since the original was released on the SNES almost twenty years ago. The series remains massively popular nonetheless, as evidenced by Mario Kart 7 outselling every other videogame in Japan last year – despite not being released until December. Are these sales due largely to a sense of duty amongst Nintendo fans, or is the magic still there?

So, yes indeed, Mario Kart 7 will be instantly familiar to anybody who’s played any previous game in the series. Lifelong fans will notice a mix of the old and the new here, however. As with Mario Kart Wii, you can unlock your Mii as a playable character, and motion controls are an option for steering (though only, oddly, if you use the new driver’s seat view). The recent introduction of karts with differing stats in regards to handling, acceleration etc. is taken one step further here, allowing you to mix & match a frame, wheel set, and parachute attachment.

The introduction of said parachute could so easily have ruined the whole experience. It’s arguably the biggest change the game introduces – but it works so well because it is, ultimately, hardly a change at all. You’ll rarely be in the air for more than a few seconds at a time, and some opportunities for gliding are entirely optional; meaning that, basically, the new attachment is mainly used for super-long jumps. There’s still a tactical element mind you, as you choose whether to try swooping under or over certain obstacles; and judge whether prolonging your flight as long as possible or diving groundwards at the first opportunity will give you that crucial half-second lead over the kart behind you.

Thankfully, this impractical perspective is not used.

The other change of note is the introduction of brief underwater sections in certain tracks. It must be said that, with no propeller-style attachment available, these sections do seem somewhat pointless. Driving underwater does seem to slow your kart slightly but apart from that, there are no noticeable benefits or drawbacks. They do nothing to improve the experience but, thankfully, nothing to detract from it either.

Coins, which are dotted around each track and here respawn after a slight delay, make a return. Collecting them (up to a maximum of ten) slightly increases your max speed, and you lose some as a penalty each time you fall off the track, hit certain obstacles, or are hit by an item used by an enemy. They also act as currency for unlocking new parts for your vehicle, as the game keeps track of your cumulative total in the background.

There are a total of 32 tracks here. 16 retro ones – tinkered with slightly to accommodate the new parachutes and underwater fetish – and 16 brand new ones. If you’re feeling generous enough to count those in the Mirror Cup as separate tracks, that’s… um… 64. The new ones are just as deviously designed as the old ones, full of turns ready to catch out those who time their powerslides wrong and shortcuts that will actually slow down those who come in at the wrong angle and/or don’t have the right item.

The item list includes series staples such as shells, banana skins, the star and so on, as well as more recent additions such as the bullet, which automatically whizzes you along the course (knocking over anybody who gets in the way) for a limited time – and the infamous blue shell. While the blue shell still homes in on whoever is in first place and is completely unavoidable, it now travels along the ground rather than through the air. This means it now hits anybody in its path on the way to first place, making it (slightly) less unfair to whoever ends up on the receiving end of the explosion at the end. The new kids in the item list are a tanooki tail (knock over anyone and anything that gets too close with a tap of the button, for a limited time) and ’7′, which awards you with seven items all at once. This isn’t the gamebreaker it may appear to be, as you’ll never be awarded with a blue shell or bullet (though you will get an invincibility star). As the items constantly rotate, choosing exactly what you use when in the middle of a race can be tricky to say the least.

There's even rain now. Rain!

As ever, what the question mark blocks award you with after you drive through one is almost completely random. Now more than ever though it adds to the challenge, rather than rendering final results entirely down to chance. Recovering from spinning out, or even suffering an explosion, seems to be a little quicker than before; and not knowing what those behind you are armed with when you’re in the lead just makes you very aware of the mini-map (which now helpfully shows what item each racer is carrying/using).

Local multiplayer is possible both with and – kudos to Nintendo, without – multiple copies of the game. Online multiplayer is also present; but is the game’s Achilles heel.

You still can’t change your character or kart between races; you’ll have to quit and start a new online race for that. The races themselves are superb however, with no noticeable loss of graphical quality and absolutely no lag. The problem is that, for some players, the words ‘communication error’ come up far too often. Just before a race, just after a race has started… exactly when you don’t want it. At CG, some of us were forced to try this (which helped, but didn’t fix the problem entirely).

In theory, Mario Kart 7 is the best of the series so far. With an online mode that’s crippled for an indeterminate number of players however, we can’t justify scoring the game quite as high as we’d like. Once everybody can enjoy an uninterrupted online session, add one more point to the number below.

This was originally going to be a review of the atrociously acronymed F.3.A.R. (that doesn’t even make any sense! What the hell is the ’3′ supposed to stand for?). Two things resulted in it morphing into an article about horror games in general. Firstly, as the review would have ended up being about seven months late, publishing it would seem a bit… silly. In case you were wondering though, I’d give it 8/10. Secondly however, one thing I was planning to mention only in passing – but which is actually an issue worth looking into – is that it’s a horror game that isn’t actually very scary.

As an FPS, F.E.A.R. 3 is a resounding success. The graphics are pretty good, with a silky smooth frame rate from start to finish. The weapons roster, while fairly limited, is admirably varied in terms of power and fire rate. The franchise’s AI is still far beyond what the competition is capable of, with intelligent use of cover and a worryingly competent understanding of flanking. You may cringe when you learn that the developers have dropped in the odd explosive barrel here and there, though.

As a horror game – which is first and foremost what all three games have been advertised as – it is a failure. A few of the scripted shocks are effective and, yes, there are one or two areas which are distinctly creepy; most notably perhaps the houses decorated with candles, blood and gore, with the rapid footsteps of unseen horrors heard every now and again. For the most part however, there is – ironically – a total lack of fear.

This is largely down to the fact that there are several lengthy, fairly traditional sequences that see you fighting your way past hordes of soldiers to progress. It’s very well done and great fun to play, but these moments also make it extremely easy to forget completely that you’re supposedly playing a horror game. The biggest mistakes are usually made when the game is going full throttle down scary avenue, however. For one thing, it relies too heavily on clichés. The whole ‘young child as monster’ thing has been done to death in the movies now and yes, Alma is central to the story; but why not take the approach the (not much scarier) second game took, and concentrate more on her adult form? Also, please note: if you’re pleased with a visual shock you’ve thought of, repeating it within minutes does not make it scarier. Quite the opposite, in fact.

Unsurprisingly, this game (and many others purporting to be horrors) makes one of the most common mistakes Hollywood never learns from. If you throw a load of monsters on-screen, that’s not horror; that’s a load of monsters. Monster movies and (effective) horror movies are two very, very different things. Therefore, when F.E.A.R. 3 starts throwing fast, leaping, pointy-toothed creatures at the player later in the game yes, it’s a good excuse to whip out the shotgun; but it rapidly drains all horror from the experience. True fear stems from the unknown and, when something is right in front of you trying to rip your face off, you know everything you need to. There’s no sense of fear interfering with your aim.

In the Christmas podcast I briefly reminisced about the original Condemned, and how it was a horror game that worked (if you have a 360 and haven’t played that game, please do so). Speaking for myself I was constantly on edge playing that game, never knowing where the next threat would come from. If I had an extremely rare firearm to hand, I knew that what few bullets I had in the chamber would have to be used wisely. There were to be no ammo pickups. This meant that combat was almost exclusively melee, forcing you to go toe-to-toe with often horrific looking enemies who fought intelligently. Enemies hide regularly and can spring from virtually anywhere; more than once, I jumped as I came under attack while searching for clues in a darkened, seemingly empty room.

If you’re a fan of the Silent Hill games then think, what makes you more tense; fighting one of the twisted, staggering enemies, or wandering through the fog in an unknown area while your radio crackles a warning that… something is nearby?

I remember that I loved, and was scared silly by, the original Shadow Man game upon release. That was almost twelve years ago, so my memories of it are vague at best; but what I do remember are wonderfully crafted moments of horror. Yes, there was a cheap (but damn effective) moment where an enemy jumped out at me from a cupboard in an old, apparently deserted building. One enemy type in particular never failed to creep me out, squawking ‘Shadow Man‘ in a broken voice as, no more than an upper torso, it rapidly dragged itself toward me with its arms. What really sticks out in my mind is the ‘Nursery’ level, populated by hideous creatures, where blood is plastered over everything. Though there are never any children to be seen, the soundtrack of discordant lullabies and cries of unseen babies made for a chilling, uncomfortable experience.

I couldn't find a picture of The Nursery, but these decapitated inmates creeped me out too.

Of course, getting the balance between enjoyable videogame and effective horror experience is not an easy task. It doesn’t help that you can’t please all of the people all of the time. For example, I just can’t seem to enjoy the first few Resident Evil games. I’ve tried playing the original on the Saturn, the PSOne, the DS, and the GameCube; I just can’t get into it. I find the control system obnoxiously awkward, and the save system obscenely, unnecessarily frustrating. For similar reasons, the two or three times I’ve tried playing the sequel soon resulted in a sulk. Oddly however, I managed to finish and enjoy Code Veronica (maybe because of its emphasis on action) and Zero (maybe because it tried something different with two simultaneous player characters. I predicted, correctly perhaps, that this was a test run for a multiplayer Resident Evil game).

I never found those games to be particularly frightening, due perhaps to their tendency to throw new monsters at you without any horrific foreplay (not to mention the aforementioned game design frustrations, which took up a lot of my attention). With a whole new playing perspective and a hee-yooge new emphasis on combat, alongside a handful of other, minor alterations, Resident Evil 4 turned the series on its head. I love that game – it’s definitely one of my favourite games ever – but, despite being light years ahead of the previous games in terms of user friendliness and fun, it all but decimated the horror of the franchise. I’ll gladly admit that the first games successfully created an almost constant atmosphere of unease, sometimes even tension; but these feelings are almost never found in 4 and 5.

I don’t subscribe to the (quite frankly ludicrous) idea that giving the series decent (though still not perfect) controls is the biggest reason for this loss of horror. I think it can almost exclusively be ascribed to the series’ new philosophy; that is, provide the player with plenty of action, with gaps between fights kept to a minimum in terms of length and frequency. There’s never going to be much time for scene setting and careful sculpting of fear in a game that lets you shoot somebody in the face with a rocket launcher from an over-the-shoulder perspective.

So, does this mean we – and the developers we rely on for our games – are forced to choose between a decent game and an effective horror experience? Not at all. Shadow Man was essentially a platform shooter; Condemned employed a smart, effective combat system – utilising a first-person perspective – with surprising depth. Although their controls are not ideal, the Project Zero/Fatal Frame games use an interesting and effective risk/reward first-person shooting system within titles that, usually, deliver a creepy atmosphere and multiple effective shocks.

In case you’re not aware, the basic idea behind combat in Project Zero/Fatal Frame is that you damage ghosts by taking pictures of them with a camera; the more of them you get in shot, and the closer you allow them to get to you, the more damage you inflict. The panic and fear involved in this system during the most hectic moments is impossible to emulate in film, as the player is in control of exactly when the picture is taken. The trick is to stop looking at what Hollywood is doing, and think about what is possible in our industry.

If you don’t know what “The NowGamer thing” is, click here. You’ll be taken to a page where said website is running a writing competition, the prize for which is a blog at their piece of webspace – which is to be regularly updated by the winner(s), completely unpaid. This has elicited some strong reactions from journalists and bloggers in the videogames arena, from 100% unpaid writers to full-time high earners. Generally speaking, there are two schools of thought; the pro-competition ‘it’s a great way to get a foot up the ladder’ camp, and the anti-competition ‘it’s unacceptable for a professional site to expect writers to provide content for free’ camp.

Firstly, let’s not forget that this is not without precedent. Just last year, IGN ran a near-identical competition which they called ‘Game Changer‘. I (very) briefly considered entering myself, but quickly decided against it. Partly because – in my personal, thoroughly unprofessional opinion – I find the writing at IGN to be by and large dry and soulless, and didn’t relish the idea of being homogenised into that culture. Also however, the idea of IGN expecting people to work for them for free angered me somewhat. IGN is a global multimedia company owned by Rupert Murdoch’s News Corporation. With the money they have at their disposal they could assign a minor celebrity to each and every one of their staff just to tell jokes about willies during break times, and for all I know that’s exactly what they do.

NowGamer is a much smaller concern; but it’s still a business. A well established website which pays its experienced writers and (it seems fair to presume) turns a healthy profit. What’s in this competition for them? Nothing, really. Well, apart from free content. And publicity. Publicity enhanced by the controversy over the nature of the competition and its prize which, I am sure you will agree, they could not possibly have foreseen.

Twitter is the best place to look for angry/happy/misguided opinions squished together in one place. It’s tempting to say that those in the ‘anti-competition’ camp are almost exclusively snobbish full-time journos, secure in their circles where every single assignment is guaranteed payment. That’s simply not the case, however; the most common argument in favour of the NowGamer competition seems to be – from some of the most successful games journos of today – “I did a lot of hard work for free, I never would have got where I am now without it”. While on the face of it a convincing argument for the project’s validity, it does ignore a few important factors.

NowGamer CEO?

Firstly, most of the best known names in the industry are old hands; at least, so far as videogame journalism is concerned. Those who did internships, apprenticeships, battleships, whatever for free will almost certainly have done so for print publications. That automatically makes it much easier to get noticed. There have only ever been so many games magazines on the shelf whereas, today more than ever, there are more multi-million dollar sites and minor blogs than you could ever possibly read in one lifetime. As has been established, NowGamer is more visible than most; but by distancing itself from the winner(s) by awarding them a “blog” rather than a more defined place in the NowGamer family, the prestige is questionable. Regular contribution to a print magazine also carries a more easily identifiable work ethic; they’d have to make it to the office on time each day, and work hard and consistently under the watchful eye of an editor.

I pity the poor lad/s or lass/es who end up winning this thing. It’s become clear from day one that many within the industry will dismiss their newfound position out of hand, considering it a worthless crumb tossed from the table of slavers. A common kneejerk reaction against the competition has been to declare “People can get their own free blog from WordPress, what’s the point of going for this one?”. Hmm, let me think. Well, how about the fact that NowGamer recorded over a million unique visitors in November 2011? In terms of promotion, all the hard work – and it is hard work – is done for you.

To be frank, anybody looking to get into full-time videogame journalism in 2012 is fast running out of roads to take. Last year, publishing giant Future Publishing culled a large amount of talented and experienced staff, and even some publications – including the much-loved PC Zone. The publisher culled them expensive, the jettisoned staff culled their former employers bad names, and everybody was forced to cull the whole thing off. Ahem. The point is, PR firms which deal in videogame matters have a long history of swiping experienced journos. Nowadays, videogame journalists must be lining up to jump into PR as it is, in all honesty, the much more secure job right now.

No, when I said PR I meant... oh never mind.

The NowGamer blog carries no guarantee of a paid, full-time job in the future, not at NowGamer or anywhere else. There’s a chance it could help however, which is surely better than nothing. On the other hand, the whole business does carry a whiff of ‘dystopian depression-flavoured future’. In effect, what we have are unemployed people – or people in jobs they hate – entering a competition where the prize is pretending to have a job they enjoy.

One important issue that NowGamer has remained silent on at time of writing is the issue of training and advice, namely: will there be any? As mentioned before, the site employs experienced and talented writers. If said writers are willing and able to offer the winner/s advice on their writing, the value of the prize suddenly becomes more clearly defined. Advice from experienced full-time journalists will be worth more than the blog, and would certainly prove to be more of a help when looking for a paid position.

If you’re a budding journalist yourself and you’re considering this competition, the choice is entirely yours. If you go for it, I say best of luck to you. If all you want is for people to read what you write, the prize is most definitely worth your time. If you’re looking for something that will help you find a full-time paid journalistic position, the value is a little fuzzier when you look at it; though it won’t harm a CV. In the unlikely event that somebody from NowGamer is reading this, pay attention right now: people will stop shouting at you if you promise to pay the winner/s at least something.