This is what your local GAME might look like soon enough.

It has been widely reported by the gaming press, including Eurogamer, that the UK’s largest independent video game retailer is in financial difficulties. The firm had a poor 2011, and whilst many had hoped the Christmas season might bring a last minute reprieve it was not to be and sales were down close to 15% compared to the year before. To put this into context, most major high street retailers in the UK experienced a rise in sales compared to twelve months earlier, as Christmas 2010 had been so poor due to excessive snow and ice keeping shoppers away from their town centres.

To be fair GAME have, for a while now, been issuing profit warnings and talking of reducing the number of shops they have over the next one to two years. This of course is taking place at the same time as HMV recently having to reorganise its debts with its lenders. However, HMV have a broader range of products, less stores but larger ones (and hence can sell more and try a greater variety of activities) and have earnestly started moving the business into new areas, albeit some more successfully than others. The firm has invested in live music and venues, and started to transfer space in stores (which was set aside to plastic boxes) to fan related merchandise and technology.

This is not to say that HMV has the answer, but I mention it as a way of demonstrating that specialist music, film and game retailers are having to find new ways and that this is hardly new. Over the last few years we have gone from having, perhaps, 3-5 retailers offering such products per high street to 1-3, with some towns having barely 2. Those two are often HMV and GAME. There is now a serious chance that over the next 2-3 years this will reduce further to one or in some cases none.

The all conquering Amazon. It's taking sales from bookstores, toy stores and of course videogame stores. It's also the perfect platform to migrate from physical product to digital download or stream. Something it is pushing more and more.

Let’s look at the reasons why and what this means for both the games industry as a whole and the consumer. Whilst it would be easy to say it’s down to the increase in downloaded content (legal or illegal), it would not be true for the overall market. For PC, clearly, it has had a huge impact but the average store dedicates very little floor space to PC titles. Meanwhile in console land, whilst you can get a small selection of titles as downloads, most are retail only, or are retail only for a long time before they go onto Xbox Live, for example. Sony has started doing near simultaneous releases for a few titles, but it does not release numbers for the PSN store; though it’s safe to say that if a game is on for significantly more money there than it is priced in shops that it can’t be picking up many sales at present.

So what does the trouble at GAME signify? It could just be that the business expanded too fast and inherited too many shops, with a range of leases and costs which are unsustainable. In other words the business has put itself into the situation it now finds itself and is not systematic of any type of global change. I suspect though that this is not the only reason the firm finds itself in trouble. It expanded rapidly, largely on being the only place which had a good selection of titles and in more recent times in supplying a strong second hand offering.

Both areas are now under attack, from both Supermarkets such as Tesco and due to the online side of the business such as Amazon, Play and many independent ‘warehouse’ only operators using the Amazon/Ebay marketplace. Whilst GAME also has a strong online presence, it’s not actually that easy to use, and doesn’t offer great prices. This is because the focus of the business has remained its stores.

So we have established that most consumers are buying boxed games still, but the market is being redefined by the online retailers and supermarkets. Yet that is not the only factor in play here. We are buying less games. Sure some games are selling in huge numbers, and for more money per purchase, but we are buying less overall.

When discussing market size, services such as PSN, STEAM and others are rarely included in such figures. However, it's clear that if you are a PC gamer, you download, you don't get the box.

The size of the UK market shrunk last year. The UK is not alone. Some people are hoping a new console generation will solve this. I doubt it will in the short term. In the medium to long term it will as people who currently play games continue to, whilst new younger generations join the ranks of hardcore gamers. However at present, there will be no sudden demographic shift where we immediately find new consumers to join our ranks. Such a culture change last took place during the Wii/DS generation and at least 30% of that has since found that smartphones suffice, as they were never hardcore gamers to begin with.

As I’m sure many of you will have noticed the games we buy take longer than ever to complete. Aha, I know what are thinking; Modern Warfare 3. This takes a bus ride to complete. That as we know is the single player experience only. The online is an ongoing all consuming social experience, with more special op operations being added, more multiplayer maps and modes. Even the Elite experience is designed to take up your gaming hours with stat analysis! Yet check out the games sale’s figures. It made more than Black Ops but sold less copies in 2011, as reported by Eurogamer.

So back to the idea of launching new consoles. The Vita is out pretty soon and as it offers an HD experience in your hand it, ironically, will split consumer spending even more. It won’t increase the size of the hardcore market but take purchases away from the PS3, Xbox and WiiU. In case you missed it we are now in the midst of a deep economic slow down, which for some people is starting to look like a depression, or at least a slow and ongoing contraction (which could last up to a decade). Whilst the entertainment sector as a whole is less effected during downturns (as reported by TIME, quoting the ever popular Michael Pachter), as people need escapism and spend less on holidays and other high price ticket items, it’s clear that new consoles and games costing £35 or above are now falling into the luxury area of disposable income for many, bar a few yearly purchases where value is eked out through replay and DLC offered throughout the year.

So less games are being bought, which means less games being traded, which results in less profits on second hand sells for the retailers such as GAME. The more money we spend on AAA titles and then investing in DLC to go with them also means we are more likely to play them to death and not trade them in (compounded by the ‘online pass’ feature meaning second hand copies lack online functionality).

So back to the present. In the short term this has been an awful week for GAME. Whilst they have managed to secure support from publishers and creditors it seems logical that consumers will slowly start to place pre-orders elsewhere in case the inevitable happens soon. Also will you be taking your games there to get reward points? What happens if the company goes down the pan and you haven’t spent those points? The time to redeem could be now, which could actually give the firm a short rebound, but if we don’t take in new games to part-ex against other new titles their business model will dry up. Publishers meanwhile will start to encourage the platform holders to push digital delivery, at decent prices (perhaps) and at the same time as the game launches on the high street. The days where they had to protect their retail distribution is perhaps starting to end.

The loss of GAME or HMV won’t mean the end of retail or a lack of competition for the consumer. We have 3-4 supermarkets in the UK of a decent size. In addition we have a plethora of online retailers all able to sell a product which is not required to be sold on the high street. After all it’s just a box with a disc in it.

The next generation of consoles will offer discs, but ultimately though, game retail will stop being physical and the next generation of consoles will offer all titles as near simultaneous digital copies, at competitive prices, as the publishers will learn a lesson from the (eventual) demise of GAME. Whilst it’s always been in their interests to protect and look after their retail channels, times are a changing and they now must look after themselves and their future distribution partners i.e. the platform holders themselves.

As predicited TVs are now shipping with game streaming software built in. This of course is a threat to everyone in the industry, but is much more of an immediate threat to one trick ponies such as GAME.

Assuming the next generation of consoles also offer a streamed game service in parallel to downloaded content for those with broadband fast enough (it’s safe to assume that a large enough market will exist 5-7 years from now with super fast broadband in many countries), it is clear that there is no hope for businesses such as GAME and HMV. In the UK it could be argued that the decline in the high street retailing of games really started with the demise of Woolworths and Zaavi (which is now online only), but the troubles at GAME have demonstrated that perhaps we have become perilously close to the tipping point which will lead to a fundamental change in the way in which the majority of gamers purchase and access future content.

Update 2: The dashboard update is now rolling out and should be with you soon. Major Nelson said via Twitter: “If you don’t have the #XboxUpdate yet, you will get it soon. It is in the process of rolling it out to all Xbox LIVE members.”

Update: Shortly before the release, Major Nelson announced via Twitter that the update has been delayed and to wait for further information coming soon. He said: “FYI: The timing for Xbox 360 dashboard update has been slightly delayed. I’ll have a status update later today.

“Thanks again for your patience. I won’t have additional details until later today. The moment I have new information, I’ll share it with you.”

Original article: Forcing its way onto your Xbox 360, a mandatory dashboard update will be released at 3pm this afternoon in the UK (or not, see above).

The drastic update will change many things you have become accustomed to, with a new dashboard design pressing itself into the corners of your screen when your console is updated.

The new interface is designed to be ultra Kinect friendly, with voice and gesture based navigation options allowing you to control your console as if you were in Minority Report (almost). Of course, you can still break the sci-fi fantasy immersion and still use the controller.

Cloud data storage is also introduced, allowing you to preserve up to 511 MBs of your precious game saves and profile data information online. It will be accessible under Settings or among the options when you are asked to select a storage device.

Also introduced are Beacons, a feature which sends a general game invite to people on your friends list and can even recruit players from Facebook should you set it up to do so.

TV related apps will also start to appear on your Dashboard over the next few months, with several on demand and catch up services due to launch soon. To start with, UK Xbox owners will get LOVEFiLM, with 4OD, Demand 5 and YouTube making an appearance later in December. BBC content will be on the service, but not until early 2012.

Assuming your console is online you should get prompted to update very soon, so keep an eye out for it and be prepared to face a slight delay before you can leap into a game.

• Format: 360 (Kinect required, version reviewed), PS3 (PlayStation Move required)
• Unleashed: Out Now
• Publisher: 505 Games
• Developer: Zoe Mode
• Players: 1-8
• Site: http://www.greasethegame.com/

In the beginning was the word, and the word was Grease. That’s right, boys and girls; this is not, as you may have thought if overhearing others talk about it, a game about the Eurozone debt crisis. It is in fact the quite literally all-singing, all-dancing Grease videogame that became more and more inevitable as microphones and motion controls became more and more popular within the games industry. The question now is: is this a dumb jock, or slick greaser?

As you navigate up and down the main menu, you’ll notice that a sound effect plays each time the cursor touches an option. Within a few seconds, you realise that these tones are playing ‘Summer Nights’ at the irregular beat of your menu browsing. It’s a nice touch, and an immediate promise/warning of the cheesiness within.

Head in to Dance, and you’ll find just a few songs available. This isn’t a problem; songs are unlocked, basically, by performing each available one once. The tracklist is presented in a linear fashion by collecting the first batch of songs in an Easy set, another in Medium, then the final few (including a more demanding version of Grease) in Hard. There is, unfortunately, no way of setting your own difficulty for each song. Once you’ve made your choice, pick your game mode and the number of players, and off you go.

The groove of the word 'grease' may be debatable, but it certainly has meaning (both as a noun and as a transitive verb).

We all know the drill by now: copy the actions of the on-screen dancers. Here, it’s computer generated characters from Grease in suitably movie flavoured surroundings. The dance moves you’ll be copying are, by and large, ones that will be familiar to fans. Considering the fact that some of the original moves involve jumping up onto cars and interacting with crowds of perfectly synchronised dancers, a few changes have been made here and there where necessary, but familiarity with the best known Grease dance routines will certainly put you at an advantage.

Most of the Grease songs are in here; certainly the most famous ones, and many that you’ve probably forgotten. However, most – if not all – seem to be cover versions. Good cover versions though and, considering how many times the production has been done and redone on stage, it won’t even be an issue for many. Look At Me I’m Sandra Dee is a bloody terrible song no matter who’s singing it, though. In place of the few songs that are missing from the original list are other, frankly better songs from the era, such as Tutti Frutti.

No matter what difficulty the song you happen to be bopping along to has been placed in, it’s not hard to build up a score of hundreds of thousands of points. The game will often err on the side of generosity but, make no mistake, a good dancer will still crush the score of a poor one. Not that we have first-hand experience of this of course (ahem). The more demanding songs such as Hound Dog are the most enjoyable, especially with a dance partner (who you’ll have to be careful not to punch in the face if you don’t have a wide playing space).

There are a few different spins on the basic dance setup, including ‘Challenge’. This is a fun idea which works quite well, involving the dance routine being interrupted throughout the song by demands for you to strike a certain pose or perform a certain move. Lyrics are displayed at the bottom of the screen for each song, meaning you can warble along if the urge takes you (though it’s very difficult to keep track of the lyrics and the dance moves at the same time). There’s even a whole separate karaoke mode to try if you wish your singing to be judged by a ruthless machine. You can also go for the more reasonable option of dancer/s performing alongside singer/s, who can use either a USB microphone or the camera’s in-built mic.

Plenty of authentic rock 'n' roll moves in this game.

Sadly, the game slips up in pretty much every area where it tries to offer further value for money. Including dance moves where a pair of dancers swap positions then dance back again is a neat idea… until you realise the game makes no attempt to recognise you’ve moved. It includes the obligatory in-dance photo-taking… but there’s no way of sharing or even saving any of the results. There are minigames… but they’re all dull, or exhausting, or both (panel beating and spray painting is about as exciting as it sounds, for example). There are clips from the movie… but incredibly, no sound. Why bother including them at all?

A small point, but one we feel is worth mentioning, is that the Kinect version (tested for this review) recognises the presence of new players quickly and easily. Fellow Kinect users, how many times have you had to wave desperately at your TV, as though you’re trying to get the attention of somebody doing their very best to ignore you? Exactly.

Though there are missed opportunities and baffling decisions here, there’s also a lot of fun to be had for Grease fans. In fact, the soundtrack (also including songs such as Long Tall Sally and Yakety Yak) and dance moves mean this would make a great gift for anybody who loves their fifties music. Well, anybody who loves dancing and/or singing along to their fifties music, anyway.

The one that you (might) want is finally taking advantage of the latest motion detection gadgetry, as Grease the game is now available on Xbox 360 and PlayStation 3. The live action launch trailer above demonstrates all of the arm swinging, hip jigging gameplay that the Kinect and PlayStation Move systems have encouraged since their inception.

Developed by Zoe Mode and published by 505 Games, Grease features officially licensed song compositions and familiar choreography that fans (and probably friends of fans) will recognise from the movie.

“Grease is an all-time classic entertainment property and it is with great pleasure that 505 Games is able to bring this updated re-imagining of the brand into the homes of fans this holiday season,” said Ralph Pitt-Stanley, General Manager – UK and Export for 505 Games. “The cutting edge new motion control technology of today’s consoles has enabled us to bring all the excitement of classic choreography and 1950’s attitude to life in ways not possible before.”

Released at the end of last week, Grease promises an interactive social singing and dancing experience and invites players to ‘turn up their style and release their inner rock ‘n roller’.

Format: XBLA (Kinect)

Unleashed: Out Now

Publisher: Microsoft Studios

Developer: Halfbrick Studios

Players: 1-2 (locally)

Site: http://www.halfbrick.com/our-games/fruit-ninja-kinect/

Fruit Ninja for iOS devices already proved that chopping oranges and pineapples to bits is way more entertaining than it should be, and porting it to the Kinect smelled of grabbing for cash– maybe even desperation. After all, Microsoft’s borderline creepy camera that watches you leap around your home isn’t exactly swimming in quality products. That’s why the creatively titled Fruit Ninja Kinect is such a lovely surprise; it’s a quality piece of software that makes a successful concept even better.

And that concept isn’t difficult to grasp: fruit will be tossed upwards and you must slice it. Of course, no longer will you swipe your finger along a screen to accomplish this, as your entire body becomes a watermelon-wasting weapon of war. Colourful fruit of all shapes and sizes will sail by as you slice, punch, and– if you’re feeling bold — kick it straight out of the air. Trying to rack up combos by cutting through bunches of fruit at once is as satisfying as the splatters of juice on the backdrop.

Slash those strawberries! Cut those coconuts! Punch those pineapples! Obliterate those oranges! Attack those apples! We could go on, trust us.

You’ll soon discover that any fighting style involving your limbs will work, whether you’re pretending to wield a pair of nunchaku like a Ninja Turtle, swinging your arms like an over-exuberant boxer, or thrusting to and fro as would a mighty samurai. Admittedly, we found ourselves grinning foolishly at the TV screen, panting and out of breath, after a particularly rousing battle as a Jedi knight.

Fruit Ninja Kinect’s technology works like a charm. The camera does a great job of calibrating silhouettes (a smart, subtle choice for representing players) and movement is snappy as can be. Minor twitches occasionally show up as haphazard slashes, especially in the all-too-sensitive menu, but that rarely interrupts your masterful demonstrations of martial arts.

Your arms are likely to fall off during this end-of-level extravaganza, but in a good way.

There are plenty of modes to keep the core mechanics fresh, and you can’t go wrong with any of them. Letting a fruit escape or striking a bomb will knock you down a life in some game types, while others focus on power-ups and timers. A riotous multiplayer mode, both co-op and versus, is there for those with local friends, along with leaderboard support if they’re not so close at hand.

But now we come to the stickler: price point. Fruit Ninja Kinect runs for 800 Microsoft Points, which is a bitter pill to swallow considering the dirt cheap iOS version. New backgrounds, blade effects, and shadows for your character model can be unlocked (along with a host of worthy achievements), but with a concept this simple, there’s only so much you can do.

Multiplayer often involves punching each other in the head, but in a good way.

Nevertheless, in the face of questionable technology, a steep asking price, and essentially existing as an elaborate mini-game from EyeToy Play (anyone remember that?), Fruit Ninja Kinect does almost everything right. It only does one thing, mind you, but it does it well.

• Format: Xbox 360 (Kinect)
• Unleashed: Out Now
• Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
• Developer: Twisted Pixel
• Players: 1-2 (offline co-op)
• Site: http://www.thegunstringer.com/

It’s no secret that the Kinect’s stock of games is a regular ghost town, a mournful wind whistling through the dusty bones of fitness trainers and mini-game collections, and The Gunstringer is stepping up as a new sheriff to lay down the law. It’s too bad that (similar to the dim-witted, drunken lawman who can’t quite shoot straight) this game is welcomed largely because it’s the only thing we’ve got.

The story kicks off with a live-action video of the Twisted Pixel crew dashing about to prepare a puppet show that features the skeletal cowboy himself. This sets the stage (that’s a pun) for the game’s greatest asset: an entirely goofy yet clever premise. Raising your left hand pulls the Gunstringer up by his strings to start the play and pointing your right hand at the screen serves as your gun (and yes, it does help to shape it into a pistol). It’s a smart way to add context to the peculiar flailing you’ll be doing.

The Gunstringer does not like snakes. This much is clear.

The Gunstringer will charge forward along a predefined path as you dance him to and fro with your left hand, your right hand blowing away enemies that both root and toot at every turn. Dodging bullets (quite literally) and hopping over sturdy bits of terrain is delegated to your left hand, though your direct control over the undead marionette is limited. You can paint up to six targets at once (not unlike Red Dead Redemption’s deadeye mode) and take them out by snapping your arm up, which is a surprisingly natural motion. Those of a left-handed nature will be glad to know that the developers are well aware your condition (coined “lefthandedness” in the options screen) and they give their deepest sympathies. The motions don’t always register perfectly, but such is to be expected of technology as floaty as the Kinect.

Of course, a variety of wacky circumstances will arise through the four multi-tiered levels, and you’ll find yourself ducking behind cover to take potshots at outlaws, riding atop a train and using two firearms to rain terror down upon your enemies, and sailing a riverboat through a distinctively perilous bayou. Some sequences are a blast, such as the precisely-controlled boss fights, while others perform with all the elegance of a two-legged mongoose, most notably the mind-numbing sword fighting sections. The controls are generally respectable and the game does an admirable job of keeping you on your toes, but it basically boils down to the inevitable on-rails shooter that we all saw coming from the Kinect’s launch.

These boss fights are among the best moments from The Gunstringer.

It’s the presentation– the bizarre blurring of lines between reality and imagination– that helps The Gunstringer stand out. Most of the game takes place in a wild west world of puppets and cardboard tube trees, but there are times when the curtain is pulled back (just look at these puns!) to show a live-action audience cheering for the animated puppet on stage. These moments are brilliantly ridiculous (the ending most of all) and work out much better than the other attempts at humour, which range from stupid-but-amusing to no-holds-barred-straight-up-stupid. The gravelly voice that unfolds every step of the Gunstringer’s plot of revenge seems especially unnecessary, as it’s impossible to avoid comparisons to the narration of the infinitely superior Bastion. The drawling voice tends to repeat lines that were barely funny the first time, let alone the sixth.

At least you can grumble about tired one-liners with a friend since another player can step into frame at any time to add another reticle to the screen. If he walks away once you accidentally jab him in the eyeball with your imaginary six-shooter, there’s plenty for you to unlock backstage, including a hardcore mode, gameplay modifiers, behind-the-scenes photos and videos, concept art, and music. Navigating these menus is a finicky chore, but spending cash earned from levels is well worth it. Medals are another reason for replay, but there’s a good chance you won’t feel inclined to fight for a gold; the gameplay just doesn’t manage to stay that engaging. Far more interesting is the code for Fruit Ninja Kinect, a delightful downloadable title previously released during 2011′s Summer of Arcade, that comes packed inside new copies of The Gunstringer. A ludicrous piece of DLC composed entirely of FMV known as The Wavy Tube Man Chronicles is also free right off the bat, which is a definite (if shallow) bonus.

Why is The Gunstringer riding on top of a rocket and fighting a fire-breathing dragon? The only reason he does anything: REVENGE.

The Gunstringer is a good effort. It plays fine, the visuals are decent, the soundtrack is fitting, and an undeniable silly streak sometimes redeems the iffy humour. However, once the nifty stocking stuffers are taken out of the picture and the motion controlled novelties are seen for what they are, you’re left with a middling on-rails shooter the leans too heavily on so-so gags. If released as an affordable downloadable title like Twisted Pixel’s other games, The Gunstringer would have some more excuses up its sleeve, but it suffers under the scrutiny of a mid-price retail product. If you’re looking for something to increase your miniscule library of Kinect games, this is a good place to look; just expect more silliness than substance.

• Format: 360 (version reviewed), PS3
• Unleashed: Out Now (on 360)
• Publisher: Ubisoft
• Developer: Q Entertainment
• Players: 1
• Site: http://child-of-eden.uk.ubi.com/

Much has been made of Child of Eden’s price-to-playthrough time, with the basic argument being, “why should I pay $49.99 for a 90-minute game.” Even without being that reductive, many reviewers have said there simply isn’t enough content. Having played over a half-dozen hours of the game so far, we’re raring for more, and wondering what everyone is whining about.

The Child of Eden experience isn’t comparable to most modern games. It’s actually closer to listening to a new album by your favorite band. The first listen is foreign and new. You can never quite process what you’re listening to on the first play. If the album is good, each subsequent listen only gets better. Layers of sound are revealed, and knowing your favorite moments only makes the journey to them all the more exciting.

There’s one moment near the end of the second level in Child of Eden entitled, “Evolution”. You’re presented with a whale covered in barnacles. As the barnacles light up, you must shoot them. The game calls this purification — you’re removing corruption from the creature. It’s a pretty long sequence, but intentionally so. The music builds and builds to a beautiful crescendo where the blue whale erupts into a bright red phoenix. It’s a beautiful, borderline emotional moment the first time you experience it, and it only gets better in subsequent playthroughs.

Child of Eden is full of moments like this, and the more you play it, the more you’ll find. This is a game with heart and soul, and anyone asking for more of it is ignoring the love and care that went into every single moment.

These moments are all amplified with the use of Kinect which makes the game even more remarkable. Child of Eden eliminates any fears we had with the Kinect’s launch titles. It makes the peripheral sing, and if there was ever a reason to get one, this is it.

Child of Eden is already a game about feel. Much of what makes the game enjoyable lies in the abstract; the synaesthetic connection between visuals, sound, and gameplay that make all of Q Entertainment’s games so special. Kinect strengthens that sensation by eliminating binary button mashing, and turning the player into a goddamn space wizard.

We’d go as far to say that Kinect is a must if you truly want to get the most out of this game. It’s perfectly enjoyable with a controller, but the game’s highs are not as high when you’re slumped on a couch.

What’s even more surprising about Child of Eden is that you don’t just drift through each level. The game has some honest danger, purple bullets that are more threatening and less abstract than the junk Rez tossed at you. Introducing a touch of Ikaruga into the simple Rez gameplay, the bullets must be shot away by switching hands and firing with a purple machine gun. On hard difficulty, the constant need to switch weapons and stay on your toes makes the game even more engaging.

Make no mistake, this isn’t a “bigger, better, more bad ass” version of Rez, but it does toss in a gameplay improvement or two. At high-level play, Rez became an exercise in squeezing every last point out of the boss fights, dragging out the levels in ways that weren’t very fun. In Child of Eden, high scores are obtained by playing the game as its meant to be played, with score bonuses tied into keeping the beat of the music.

Child of Eden’s best quality is that it can be every bit as challenging as it is visually arresting. We dare any rail-shooter detractor to try it and say it isn’t an engaging experience. Sure, you may go down a linear path, but there’s plenty of tricks to learn and employ along the way.

As stunning a journey as Child of Eden is, it isn’t without flaw. While we argue the game doesn’t need to be artificially lengthened, the developer wasn’t quite as confident in their product. An unlock system keeps you from accessing the later levels until you’ve earned a certain number of stars. If you don’t do well on the first few levels, you’ll most likely have to replay one or two before unlocking the final level. Once you’ve unlocked the levels, that problem won’t rear its ugly head again. But it’s something that Q Entertainment should seriously consider patching out of the game. It’s a needless addition that derails the game’s subtle narrative just to keep consumers from seeing the credits roll too soon.

The reality is that the credits will roll many times. Each level is extremely replayable, and the game is so well-paced that its a joy to fight your way to the cool parts.

The cold, serious tone of Rez is tossed aside in favour of themes like joy, happiness, and beauty. It might not be as “cool” as Rez, but Child of Eden is a more emotional journey. It may even seem a bit corny at first, but go along for the ride and you may be surprised by effect the game has on you. Who knows, you might even cry a bit, baby.

Impressive as the Kinect tech is, the device isn’t exactly drowning in hardcore games. As a result, many core gamers are sitting on the fence when it comes to buying one; or often, they’re camped out so far on the side of not getting one, they can’t even see the fence. With the PS3 version delayed till September, could Ubisoft’s Child of Eden be the game to change that?

If you can get to Dean Street in London between now (or the 5th of June if you can travel back and forth through time at will) and the 20th June, you can try the game out and make your own mind up. Just like the (ahem) celebrities above! In that there video, you can catch brief glimpses of Dextah Fletchah, Iaiaiain Lee, and Jonathan ‘Wossy’ Woss (looking like a tramp who’s stolen a suit). The video even opens with The Japanese Popstars (us neither) chatting about the game.

Dates and full address for The Child of Eden experience appear at the end of the video, and also on the inevitable Facebook page. This is one promo event we’d happily recommend you find some time for; if you do, feel free to come back and let us know what you think.

Ubisoft Conference: June 6^th 10:30pm GMT

Here we go with Ubisoft. We already know about Assassin’s Creed Revelations, but what else will they have? E3 2010 saw them largely focus on fitness and dancing – hopefully they will have learned their lesson since then. Oh and the horrible comedian and that weird laser-tag thing. Let’s try to forget all that.

• Show begins with a video showing 25 years of Ubisoft.
• CEO Yves Guillemot takes to the stage to once again attempt English. Starts showing off total game sales over the years, links back to starting with Rayman and thanks the crowd.
• Yves brings Michel Angel to the stage to talk about Rayman Origins. He also attempts English…then some horrible back and fourth with Yves.
• The on-stage demo of the game begins. Apparently the demo is hard to play. They are playing co-op. Has a very old school charm to its style. Tetris music + in-game joke meets my approval.
• An underwater section is next, they are being chased by a very strange looking creature.
• A snow section is next mixed with aerial combat, I wonder if they are picking stereotypical annoying environments from most games on purpose? Demo ends with a very awkward joke that fails to land in the cinema.
• Aaron Priceman takes the stage. Mister Caffeine? Oh, he’s quite hyper. I’m going to hate this individual.
• Yes, let’s all talk about the 80s. And make fun of Charlie Sheen. That’s modern! Please stop talking Aaron. No. That wasn’t funny. Nor was that. Or that. Shut up, Aaron.
• Gaming is adventure. He’s talking so fast I’m losing the will to listen to him. I still don’t know which game he’s talking about. Get on with it!
• A trailer starts retro style. Ah, it’s Driver. Driver San Francisco. He mentions a game changing twist. Trailer seemed to skip a little at one point, don’t think it was on purpose. Either way it isn’t actual gameplay.
• I just noticed that Aaron’s microphone is quite large. Another reason to hate him.
• From Ubisoft Montreal Dan Hay and Jamie Keen take the stage. You are Jason Broady. That’s good to know. After that confusing introduction a trailer begins for what I’m guessing is a new Farcry.
• We get to listen to a very foul-mouthed evil person whine on and on about being evil. Then our hero escapes and also swears a bit. How edgy. Now he’s acquired a weapon.
• Some general exploration mixed with gun play and rather brutal knife kills. Then things start exploding and get rather fast-paced. The visuals for the most part are particularly nice, especially given it’s a console he’s playing it on. I wouldn’t want to be Jason Broady, he has a bit habit of running into nut cases.
• Closes on Farcry 3 title, coming 2012.
• The irritating Aaron is back to announce Randy Pitchford from Gearbox. He’s here to talk about Brothers in Arms games. He says they were challenged to make a new take on WW2 games, because the world needs more of those. It’s about “kicking Nazi ass”, they’ve clearly made some innovations here.
• A trailer about the ‘furious four’ plays. Seems you get to play as one of four stereotypical gits in a very action focused game that doesn’t look very good at all.
• Aaron is back. Apparently marriage is next. The one between gaming and Hollywood. A trailer plays. Steven Spielberg talks about Tintin. If anyone asks the point at which I lost interest in this trailer – that was it.
• I don’t know about you but what makes a trailer for me is two old guys talking for about five minutes on a subject they know nothing about. To be fair, afterwards they did show some real gameplay. Not good gameplay, but you know. The Adventures of Tintin The Game, coming soon.
• Aaron is talking about Ghost Recon now. More bad jokes. Where are you, snipers? An old school style trailer plays, guessing it will then advance and show proper Ghost action.
• Yup, Tommy Jacob and Roman Oriola take the stage to talk about Future Soldier. It’ll be on the floor playable for the crowds. An on stage demo then begins.
• Swampy village type area, the Ghost team wading through it. It’s a stage set in Nigeria. The team activates camo suits. That’s cheating a bit, isn’t it? A saved civilian doesn’t seem phased by stealth suit using Americans. It is revealed that it isn’t just one person playing, it’s four of them.
• The fire fights that follow aren’t as impressive as the coordinated stealth sections. Some kind of overhead map section is next, plotting out route and area before they begin moving through it.
• All four players using active camo in this section to take down various targets. Doesn’t seem to be any limit on the camo, even when ‘spotted’ to a certain degree. Things go loud again. For the most part the gameplay seems solid, getting together four people to play it looks like a lot of fun. No date given for release. Version played was Xbox. Multiplayer will be playable on the E3 floor.
• There’s talk next about PC. Ubisoft Singapore will be making a Ghost Recon Online, a PC game and it’s “absolutely free”. Looks much simpler but does incorporate the advanced technology. Free to play and applications for the Beta can be put in now.
• Tommy – don’t clap your own game. It’s bad form.
• Sadly, Aaron is back yet again. “More and more of gaming, is sharing” – really? Epic fail on the epic fail joke.
• Two people with names so complicated I will not insult them by trying to spell them here take the stage from Nadeo Publishing. They are here to chat about Trackmania 2 for PC.
• About three minutes in I’m still not quite sure what they are talking about, but hopefully this video will keep things nice and simple. The video shows some player made maps. Most fairly extreme and some roller-coaster style. Shootmania, Questmania…ah yes I remember this stuff from last year now. Still as confusing now as it was then and very, very strange.
• Aaron mentioned rabbits. Getting a bit sick of those. The way he described them is exactly how I’d describe him. Antoine Henry is on to blather away about the annoying rabbits, for Kinect.
• Pro-tip Ubisoft: if you’re going to make a pretend sitting room set to show off a Kinect game, make it a realistic size. Apparently four people can play it at the same time. Really? Oh wait they’re going to try it. Someone better injure themselves or it won’t be a genuine multiplayer Kinect experience.
• If for whatever reason you wanted your friends to see you pull stupid poses, Kinect Rabbits let you upload to Facebook and so on.
• Aaron is back, trying to draw attention away from people in the background altering the set. He’s talking about fear. Being locked in a room with him for an hour would scare me. He’s talking about pulling people from the audience to dance. Another retro video playing showing 8-bit dancing.
• Just Dance 3. Quickly moving on…nope, awful advert first.
• Tony Key takes the stage. Sadly he’s talking about Just Dance some more. He quickly moves on though to talk about Rocksmith. It’s a good job no one else has made a guitar simulation game. Oh wait.
• Video plays. It seems that it uses essentially a real guitar, sort of. It might be better than those other franchises if it really teaches guitar actually, a fun way to get around the tedium when you start. Coming Fall 2011.
• The next subject is…fitness. You learned nothing from last year! Your Shape Evolved. A video plays of people who don’t at all look stupid bouncing around. Out later this year.
• Aaron blathers on and then there’s a retro style Assassin’s Creed video.
• Assassin’s Creed Revelations. Alexandre Amancio and Martin Schelling take the stage to talk about the game. After a bit of chatting it’s straight into a trailer. After a lovely CG battle it looks like Ezio is caught and marched off to be hanged, all the while seeing Altair’s ghost.
• The E3 gameplay demo then begins. The first new thing shown off is area-of-effect bombs. Then it’s straight into combat briefly. Next is line grappling and then more fighting. Next he mounts a flame-thrower for a while before an escape sequence across burning ships. His own fault for setting them alight really. Demo ends with Animus related footage and then a mysterious glowing door. Released this November.
• Aaron is back to finish the show. Last chance to do something about him, snipers.

No real surprises here, but that isn’t to say Ubisoft disappointed. The absence of anything Splinter Cell was interesting. Ghost Recon, Farcry 3 and Revelations look good.

Xbox 360 Conference: June 6^th 5:30pm GMT

Well here were are again. It’s always such a pleasure. For right or wrong reasons it feels a lot like Nintendo and Sony will be dominating the press coverage this year, so Microsoft are going to have to do something special to get any significant attention. You can read that last sentence as ‘not wasting an entire conference on Kinect this time around’. It would also help if they didn’t accidentally leak Halo 4 an hour and a half before starting.

• The stage is looking very green as per usual. Last year there seemed to be a competition between all conferences for who could wear the most ridiculously oversized microphone while on stage – how will MS do?
• It begins. Last year opened with Black Ops, will it be MW3 this year? Disappointingly, yes.
• A person is visible on stage pretending to play during a cutscene, then begins actually playing when his controller disconnects itself. Great start!
• A small team floating around what looks like a flooded subway or something similar. Following a pipe with distant explosions visible. Russians mentioned.
• Some mine-dodging later another checkpoint is reached and a submarine passes over head Stardestroyer style. Person on stage still pretending to be concentrating really hard. A mine is planted on the Stardestroyer.
• A big explosion later the player travels to the surface for a lovely view of a city in the distance clearly under attack. ‘Proper’ MW gameplay then begins on the now floating sub.
• Play any previous MW title to get an idea of what it’s like to watch this being played.
• There is a time skip to later in the level. It’s all very reminiscent of the opening boat level from MW1. Slow-mo room breaches return as expected.
• It’s back to the surface now for a trip in a boat. The visuals are very impressive during this section even if the gameplay isn’t. It seems the Russians are using incredibly flammable boats, the fools.
• 90% of what was shown might as well have been a cutscene, no wonder the on-stage ‘player’ looked bored.
• Robert Bowling and Glen Schofield take the stage for Sledgehammer Games to talk about MW3.
• Heart and souls have gone into making MW3, presumably as some form of godless sacrifice.
• Don Mattrick takes the stage next to begin the keynote proper.
• He begins by thanking the loyal fans and boasting about how well last year went (comparatively speaking, I am guessing).
• “A better way to enjoy television” is on the cards, but he begins with games.
• From Crystal Dynamics, Daniel Neuberger comes on stage to show off Tomb Raider. His friend Dan plays the demo placed near the beginning of the game.
• Lara is shipwrecked and for some reason appears to be hanging upside down in a straight jacket. She frees herself after a lot of groans and stab wounds and that aren’t at all meant to increase the heartbeat of any youngsters watching.
• The visuals are very impressive though. The stage visuals I mean.
• Something or someone appears to be stalking Lara as she makes her way. She’s suddenly attacked and a brief QTE starts. Lara can highlight sections of the world that are relevant to making progress, her ‘survival instinct’. A fairly simple puzzle plays out involving jumps, flame and water before another escape sequence.
• If someone heard you listening to this demo they’d assume you were watching aggressive porn.
• Lara is attacked one last time by the mysterious stalker that had been hounding her and then makes her way through some more collapsing caves with QTE actions being required every so often.
• Once outside she sees a wrecked ship, boat and numerous other vehicles from different time zones (Bermuda Triangle setting perhaps?). Demo over.
• EA Sports president Peter Moore unfortunately takes the stage next. Makes terrible joke. Will not repeat it.
• Goes on about Kinect and sports. Four new Kinect friendly titles will be coming out and you can probably guess them. Seems very excited about combining the likes of Fifa with Kinect.
• Sims and Kinect coming together later this year.
• Bioware co-founder Ray Muzyka comes to the stage backed by Mass Effect soundtrack.
• “Mass Effect 3 is all about kick-ass action”. “Mass Effect 3 will also support Kinect through voice recognition.” Oh dear.
• On stage demo begins. If he says E3 is his favourite shop on the citadel I am stopping this right now.
• Shepard makes his way through some destroyed buildings, begins a conversation with Mordon. It seems like Kinect picks up you reading out one of the options in conversations and chooses it.
• Next it shows him using voice commands to cause team mates to move and use their abilities. Also demonstrates close combat special attack.
• Large enemy mech-like suit crashes in piloted by a humanoid figure. Demo ends here. Ray calls it epic – didn’t seem that way.
• Ubisoft and Tom Clancy is next. Trailer for Ghost Recon Future Soldier begins. High tech Americans picking on terrorists that might as well be using peashooters. Couldn’t tell if it was CG or in game footage.
• Yves Guillemo takes the stage to attempt to speak English. Speaking about using Kinect to enhance their ‘core games’. Chris comes on stage to show Ghost Recon being played. He isn’t holding a controller.
• Using Kinect and his hand he customises some weapons. Audience applauds a gun being moved side-to-side for some reason. Though the smoothness of his actions to the footage is fairly impressive. Voice recognition also working well.
• “Optimise for close combat” command seems to do just that. “Randomize” command also worked. He then played a testing arena using his random weapon (again no controller).
• Not sure why someone would want to play a game like that without a controller, but the voice recognition was fairly fun.
• “All future games in the Tom Clancy franchise will leverage Kinect.”
• Marc Whitten from Xbox Live takes the stage to quite a lot of ‘woos’ from the audience.
• “We must make the technology invisible” – really?
• TV has a new voice apparently and it’s yours. Awkward woman on stage demonstrating voice recognition commands with Kinect. Promoting not needing a controller as some kind of positive for reasons unknown.
• Partnerships and content will grow to millions this year. You Tube is coming to Xbox Live. (Can I plug my channel?)
• Bing is coming to Xbox.
• Delay from woman’s commands to something actually happening on screen does suggest this isn’t really legitimate reactions on stage.
• He announces that live television will be coming to 360 for the US and worldwide. Including Sky in the UK.
• Trailer then plays showing all the same features just shown. Appealing to certain lazy non-gamer types perhaps, but what it’s doing at E3 I don’t know.
• Dana White takes the stage to talk about UFC. He looks fairly intimidating. I will be nice about this uninteresting sport.
• A trailer plays mixing Kinect options and interactions with footage of UFC matches. Some kind of betting system on who will win matches.
• Phil Spencer comes to the stage.
• He talks about the core. Xbox is about games. This will be building up to Halo. Apparently every single thing from this point on is available only on 360.
• A game that more than one million people have pre-ordered…oh no. Yeah, Gears of War 3. I will stomach Cliffy B for you people. Be happy.
• Cliffy B and his teeth take to the stage. Small microphone this time around. Good. Thanks everyone for taking part in the pointless beta. He’s going to be playing part of the campaign and brings on Ice-T to play with him. I have no idea who that is.
• An infected sea creature has caught up with Marcus and team and they need to fight it off. Generic Gears gameplay follows, though the large monster is impressive to look at. Thankfully no horrible, fake team-talk this year around from the stage too.
• Silverback suits are entered. Now they look slightly more muscled than before. It is in fact the same breed of sea creature that has been in the previous game only slightly altered. The in-game conversations are almost identical too. As is the process of killing it. Silverbacks can be used as cover.
• And the demo is over. There really wasn’t much playing to it. Whoever Ice-T is then goes on about making a song about Horde. They walk off to a trailer playing.
• Crytek trailer next. Something about Rome. A Kinect sword fighting game. Trailer is utterly unrealistic and all cutscene. The game is called Ryse.
• Halo music plays.
• “10 years ago Halo changed the way people play games” – yeah, thanks for that.
• A remastered version of the first Halo game. Enhanced multi-player, co-op and so on. Halo: Anniversary. Is it too late to pitch an alternate title? Halo: Cash-in.
• Dan Greenawalt takes the stage for Forza 4. Starts talking about cars in a manner which frankly worries me. Using a controller he then plays the game. I say play, but then a trailer using game footage players and he isn’t actually doing anything.
• Something about Top Gear. Even more reason to stop paying attention for a few minutes. Out October 11^th.
• Peter Monte-cristo takes the stage to rant about a new Fable. Called The Journey. CG trailer plays. Why is it the Age of Heroes keeps ending? “Albion’s end is coming” – about time.
• Stage demo then begins with a Kinect horse ride. Delay between on-stage and on-screen activities. Magic casting using hand motions and hand-slashing close combat. Game is out in 2012.
• Phil Spencer is back. Starts talking about an indie game that came out of no where. Minecraft.
• This year Minecraft is mixing with Kinect. Console début this winter exclusively on Xbox360+Kinect.
• He then announces a collaboration with Disney. Kinect Disneyland Adventures. An interactive Disneyland for those too lazy to go to one for real.
• Demo begins of two kids doing ‘Peter Pan’s Flight’. Horrible, horrible acting. Again it doesn’t look like they are really playing, but they probably are. Or maybe not. They reach Captain Hook and it ends there.
• “Great job you two!” – don’t try to be actors.
• Two more awful children play an Alice in Wonderland themed game now. “This is so cool!” one of the kids says for reasons unknown. Game will be available this holiday. Ends with a trailer.
• Star Wars music plays. Star Wars Kinect. Cleverly they are showing the trailer rather than the now infamous footage of Kudo actually trying to play it for real. Though even in the footage it just looks so cumbersome and slow.
• Oh dear it’s a on-stage demo of the same section that’s been doing the rounds. Let’s see if it goes any better.
• “Lightsaber On!” – is that how those things work?
• On stage player tries to lift a ship and throw it away. Fails miserably first try. Second try goes better. Terrible delay between his slashes and them happening in the game. Sabre fighting seems slow and basic. Graphics are pretty terrible.
• Next up is Tim Schafer for Double Fine. He looks more like a Hobbit every time I see him. He’s showing off Sesame Street Once Upon a Monster for Kinect.
• Elmo! Kill him! Oh, apparently you can’t. This reminds me of those interactive holographic fairytales they had in Star Trek Voyager. In a disturbing, bad way. To be fair, young kids will probably love this kind of thing.
• Kudo Tsunoda takes the stage to talk about Kinect again. Bah. When he speaks it’s like he’s constantly smelling something awful under his nose. Perhaps he is, given the amount of garbage coming out of his mouth.
• Kinect Fun Labs. That sounds fun. Controller free entertainment, starting with ‘people scanning’. “In the future, you can become your avatar.”
• You can instantly create an avatar that looks like you, because apparently we all want that. Kinect also seems to capture clothing. Resulting avatar looks barely like the person on stage, however the clothes do match. How is that going to work for branded stuff?
• Kinect ‘finger tracking’ is the next thing. Doesn’t it already do that? Person on stage takes a picture of himself in a stupid pose, then a second to go with it. He’s drawing in the air with his finger and lines appear in front and behind his image, in 3D.
• Kinect ‘object capture’. I like my soul where it is, thank you. Woman holding a bizarre toy takes to the stage. She makes a digital version of it then dances around. Again I’m curious about how this will all work with copyrighted images, figures or material.
• Kudo talks some more. White noise. Some of it is available right now to try. He leaves to a trailer of Kinect Sports 2 using Xbox Live avatars.
• Nicole Makilna (don’t have such a complicated surname if you expect me to spell it right!). She’s here to talk about in-game voice and Kinect gestures for playing sports within video games. She’s showing golf and football.
• A gesture can make the game give you a view of the whole course. She takes a swing. “Change club” command and specific club name worked.
• Oh they meant rugby, not football. Two men take to the stage with awful back and fourth conversation about plays. “Time to show off the bazooka” – careful now, kids might be watching this stuff.
• From Harmonics Kasson Crooker takes the stage for Dance Central 2 to perhaps embarrass himself again with some – yeah he did that dance.
• Tuned out for a few minutes there because there was music and dancing and other things I’m allergic too.
• Don is back, probably to wrap up and end on something big. Come on, Don, don’t just go on about Kinect. Call of Duty DLC will be available first on 360.
• He closes with a first look at……..wait for it. The start of a new trilogy apparently. Something familiar about this but I can’t place it. Ah, a brand new Halo set after Halo 3. Halo 4. Okay then. Out next year.

That’s it for Microsoft. Very Kinect heavy which is a great disappointment. It probably isn’t the case, but I come away honestly believing most of the on-stage demos were using pre-recorded footage for the Kinect interactions. If that’s true it may just be to avoid the mistake Nintendo made last year during the Skyward Sword stage demo.